Halloween came early for Commies fans. And what a horror show the game in Dallas was for the Commies. This was the kind of game that Commies fans watched with their hands over their eyes. Much like when you were a kid watching a scary movie. On Sunday, Commies fans peeked through their fingers to see if the game was getting better. Each time a new horror jumped out to scare Commies fans. A pick-six interception. A missed tackle. Two defensive players running into each other like the Keystone Cops. Dropped passes. Jayden Daniels leaving the game injured. It was one frightening moment after the next.
The list is long as to why the Commies are a complete mess and got blasted by the Dallas Cowboys. Grab some of that Halloween candy you bought at Costco to comfort yourself as we go through the reasons why the Commies lost.
Pass Defense
The Commies’ pass defense continues to be a complete joke. The pass defense looks utterly clueless to the point that the players are looking comical. Quan Martin and Marshawn Lattimore ran into each other like they were the Wet Bandits from Home Alone as CeeDee Lamb easily coasted 74 yards for a touchdown. This play was the perfect encapsulation of the Commies’ pass defense.
Dak Prescott easily shredded the Commies’ pass defense as he completed 21 of 30 passes for 264 yards and 3 touchdowns. CeeDee Lamb roasted the Commies’ secondary for 5 catches for 110 yards and 1 touchdown. George Pickens terrorized the Commies’ secondary with 4 catches for 82 yards. Once again, the Commies looked bewildered at the thought of covering a tight end as Jake Ferguson had 7 catches for 29 yards and 2 touchdowns.
There is nothing positive to say about the Washington pass defense. All of the players look awful. Quan Martin and Marshawn Lattimore are both putrid. How do these two guys keep running into each other in every game? Mike Sainristil continues to have a nightmarish sophomore season. The problem is that there is no solution to this issue on the Washington roster. Adam Peters did a bad job assembling the defensive roster, and the franchise is stuck with what they have for the remainder of the season.
Run Defense
Like Jason Voorhees seemingly coming back from the dead, the Commies’ 2024 run defense came back like a bad nightmare. This is the second consecutive game that the Commies run defense looked like it did in the 2024 season.
Javonte Williams rushed 19 times for 116 yards and averaged 6.1 yards per carry, and 1 touchdown. The Commies’ run defense offered no pushback at all to the Dallas rushing attack. The Cowboys were a hot knife and the Commies were the warm butter as the Dallas rushing attack was unstoppable.
Over the past two games, the Commies have allowed the lead running back from the opposing team to rush 33 times for 224 yards for an average of 6.8 yards per carry. Washington cannot have an atrocious run defense along with an impotent pass defense. If this is what we are going to get for the remainder of the season, then things might get even uglier. This is the football version of the old saying that you can be pretty and dumb, and you can be ugly and smart. But you can’t be ugly and dumb. That is what we are getting with the Washington defense at this point.
Joe Witt, Jr.
Witt looks overwhelmed every week. Witt has been consistently outcoached and outmaneuvered by opposing offensive coordinators. This is nothing new. Witt looked clueless for most of 2024, and that has continued in 2025. Witt is not qualified for the role of Defensive Coordinator.
The Washington defense allowed little opposition to the Cowboys. It was stunning how quickly the Cowboys were able to score. They had a 5-play 66-yard drive that took just 1 minute and 55 seconds. They had a 1-play 74-yard drive that only took 11 seconds. They had a four-play 72-yard drive that took just 35 seconds. To allow three drives like that in one game is inexcusable.
There is no doubt that the players deserve a large slice of the blame pie for the defensive woes in 2025. But the coaching also has to eat a big helping of blame pie, too. At some point, Dan Quinn needs to take over defensive playcalling duties. At the very least, it is obvious that Quinn is going to have to fire Witt at the end of the season.
Turnovers
Turnovers and penalties are the two most influential factors in whether a team wins or loses in the NFL. Unfortunately, the Commies are terrible in both categories. Once again, the Commies’ defense managed zero turnovers. Meanwhile, Washington coughed up the ball twice. Daniels fumbled. Again. Mariota tossed a horrific pick-six.
Nothing about this is sustainable. The Washington defense cannot defend the pass, and it cannot defend the run. All that is left is for them to at least create turnovers. However, that seems to be an impossible ask of the Commies. The only path forward to getting any victories over the grueling next three weeks if for the Commies to start forcing some timely turnovers.
This is not 2024. The Washington offense is ravaged with injuries, and Daniels is having a bit of a sophomore slump. The Washington defense cannot rely on the offense to score over 30 points every game to save the day. At some point, the defense must start forcing turnovers to help the undermanned offense.
Penalties
Let’s look at the other most influential factor on winning and losing in the NFL. The Commies were penalized 11 times for 118 yards. It was a calamity of errors from start to finish. All three phases of the Commies joined in on the penalty party.
Special Teams had three penalties. An illegal block above the waist, a tripping penalty, and a kicking out of bounds penalty. A kick out of bounds penalty is particularly unacceptable in today’s NFL.
Offense contributed to the cause with five penalties. There were four false start penalties. These kinds of penalties are drive killers. Especially for an offense with a depleted receiver corps. The offense also had a delay of game penalty coming out of a timeout. Seriously? How does this happen?
Defense got into the fun with three penalties. There were two pass interference penalties and a roughing the passer penalty.
This is all a reflection of coaching. Dan Quinn and his staff are not doing their jobs when a game is this littered with penalties. This one is all on the coaching to clean up. The Commies are not good enough on offense or defense to have this many penalties in a game and still hope to win.
Offensive Issues
Daniels continues to have accuracy issues. Daniels went 12 of 22 passes for 156 yards with an unimpressive 54% completion percentage. Daniels also chipped in 8 carries for 35 yards, averaging 4.3 yards per carry.
The fact remains that Daniels still looks off compared to his 2024 season. For the Commies to beat the Cowboys, the defense needed to force a few turnovers, and Daniels had to be Superman. Unfortunately, Daniels was not even close to being Superman. To be fair to Daniels, the wide receivers were also dropping passes. In general, no defense is scared of a passing attack featuring Chris Moore, Luke McCaffrey, Jaylin Lane, and Robbie Chosen.
The running game also continues to be totally absent for the second straight game. This was similar to the Chicago Bears game. The Bears had a horrendous run defense, yet they looked like the 1985 Bears against the Commies last week.
The Cowboys have the worst defense in the NFL by a mile. Coming into the game, the Cowboys were ranked 32nd, having surrendered 401.6 yards per game. The Cowboys were ranked 30th in rush defense, having given up 141.3 rushing yards per game. Yet, for a second straight week, the Commies’ offense made a truly terrible defense look like the Ray Lewis-led 2000 Ravens defense.
Jacory “Bill” Croskey-Merritt rushed 13 times for just 33 yards and averaged a pathetic 2.5 yards per carry. For the past two games against awful defenses, Bill has rushed 30 times for 94 yards, averaging just 3.1 yards per carry. Bill has looked like what he is: a 7th-round rookie thrust into the starting running back position.
To be fair, injuries at the wide receiver position play a huge role in the disappearance of the running game against two horrendous defenses. With Terry McLaurin, Deebo Samuel, and Noah Brown all out, there is zero pass threat at all. This allows opposing defenses to load the box to stop the run and play man pass defense, knowing that the Commies have nothing at the wide receiver position that is even remotely a threat. This is what the Commies can continue to expect to see every game going forward until they get some of their receivers back from injury.
Daniels Injury
Once again, Mr. Glass had to leave the game with a hamstring injury and did not return. Daniels is slated to have an MRI on his hamstring today. This is now the third injury Daniels has suffered over the past twenty-seven games. It is going to be hard to build a sustained winner if Daniels becomes a player who is always injured.
Conclusion
Watching the Commies against the Cowboys looked just like watching the Ron Rivera Washington teams. An uneven offense. A truly putrid defense. And an older ex-defensive coordinator as head coach, looking helpless and offering no solutions.
At this point in the 2025 season, the Commies are an old, slow, and soft team. This team does not tackle well at all. This team gets pushed around far too easily. This team gets injured at a high rate. None of that is going to change this year.
I have nothing positive to offer Commies fans for the remainder of the 2025 season. I believe that the Commies are going to find themselves at 3-7 after playing the Kansas City Chiefs, Seattle Seahawks, and Detroit Lions. At that point, the Commies will be 1-6 in the NFC, and any hopes of making a run at the wildcard spot for the playoffs will be officially over.
Unfortunately, by Week 11, Commies fans will be focused on mock drafts, potential free agents, potential coaching changes, and salary cap estimates. Luckily, Commies fans have plenty of experience at this since this has been the default setting for the Washington franchise for the past 25 years.
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